This might be one of the first lessons for me in the year 2011…just want to share what I experienced and what I regretted of…
Do you realise that words coming out of our ‘small part of the body located on the face, just below the nose’ (you must know what I mean), are very powerful to destroy or to build up? The bible makes it clearer and precise, even not referring to ‘that part of the body’, but to ‘something inside it’ – “tongue”.
“And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.” (James 3:6)
“But no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” (James 3:8)
These verses sounded in my mind for the past couple of days!
For those of you who are just like me, love talking, like making other people laugh, saying something without thinking what the effects behind it, do you realise that those make us suffered so much? We ended up realising that the word coming out of our mouth is just too much, hurting people maybe, or make them uncomfortable, annoyed, and so on, even though we really didn’t mean it (God knows!).
Apologising is the first and the most important thing to do
Even though this seems simple, but it’s very difficult to implement. This needs humility and humble heart. Realising that we are the ones who are guilty is very important so that we can expect and anticipate the worst response from those whom we (unintentionally) hurt/annoyed.
The first apologise should come to God, as He’s hurt the most. Even though He is hurt the most, He is the most loving to us. He is forgiving and ready to help to change the bad to be the good. And the good news is that He is always ready to help us to repent, He is too kind!
The second step is to apologise to those annoyed/hurt. Direct apologising is always the best, it makes everything clear. Most of the cases, direct apologising leads to a better situation. But the problem is the chance to do that is not always there. Sometimes, we don’t even know how to start as he/she is already too annoyed and decided to stay away from us. Alright, what I learnt was that I came to God and asked Him to make him/her realise that I felt guilty and really wanted to apologise and make everything clear. Then I also ask God to show him/her that I really didn’t mean it. If there is at last a chance, I will make things clear.
The third party not only can make things better but also worse
For those who are annoyed and those who make people annoyed, telling other people what we are feeling seems like a remedy. Particularly if those whom we are talking to are listening to us, standing with us, empathising us, and so on. Well, that’s good. I did that many times. Things can be better, but also can be getting undone. We need to talk to other people for sure, that’s why God created us as social creatures. That’s the purpose of the body of Christ. We need each other. But let me remind you that all people are sinful and imperfect. Leaning on only to the opinion, responses, and comments from other people without asking for God Himself to give guidance to us is really unhelpful. Yes, we need to share with other people, but God is the only One who knows what’s really happening.
Now, to those who are feeling guilty
You might already apologise and feel regretful, but seems you are not able to return things back like what it was…this is what I learnt, I am not perfect, I can always be wrong, but God is there, he knows everything, His love will overcome the bad with the good. All I need just to come to His feet and repent.
To all my friends, through this writing, I really want to humbly deliver all my regrets and apologise for all the mistakes and hurting words I’ve ever made. I am really sorry and I really didn’t mean those, God is the witness…