How often do we change our mind not because we think it’s better or right, but merely because we hope to be more accepted by people who, again we think, have different mind with us? How often do we change our cloths not because we want to change it but solely because we don’t want people give bad comments about our cloths? How often do we try to avoid other people’s attention by sitting on the back of a seminar? If we often do these, i am afraid that we are in the wrong track.
If we cancel doing something because we want other people happy, that’s a different matter, to some extent we are doing a good thing. What I mean here is that we don’t want to make other people happy, but try to make ourselves ease that in fact we fail. Sometimes we need to change our mind because we consider other people, but make sure that we don’t consider what other people will think about us too much.
Once, I planned to attend a party with some of my friends. One and half hour before deciding to finally leave, I changed my cloths hundreds times. After getting tired, I finally chose the most simple one because in my mind ” I don’t want to be too ‘eye catching'”. In the deepest of my heart, I want to wear another cloths, but I retained my want and said “the color is too light, enta, what will your friends say about your cloths?” You know what happened next? The party finished, and we went home without talking about cloths like what I thought before.
Another story, again about cloths, is about wearing a wrong costume. It was a welcoming dinner of international students of my uni. In my thought, because it was dinner, I should wear a formal costume. You know what happened next, I was the only one wearing formal cloths. Jeans and t-shirt looked to be the most common costume at that time. Knowing that I was in a difficult situation, I lost my comfort and began to be unease. Many times I looked at my cloths and felt embarrassed. But, one of my friends told me “nobody looks at your cloths, if so nobody cares, so enjoy this time”. I looked around and yeah, all people were busy with their business.
Many times we are too busy with what people think about us, but in fact, they are also busy with their mind, their business, they don’t even have time to think about what we are thinking about them. So why we are too busy with what will they think about us?